ORGANIZATIONAL

THEATRE

Coaching Vs Mentoring

Purpose Fulfilled

∗  We discussed the benefits of a mentoring program for the mentee.

∗  We defined mentor and explained the role and responsibilities by way of key mentoring practices.

∗  We reviewed expectations and the do’s and don’ts of mentoring.

∗  We took a journey through real life mentoring scenarios.

∗  We talked about communication and active listening skills.

Active Listening

∗  Interpret what you heard.

∗  Evaluate the information and decide how you will use it.

∗  React based on what you heard and evaluated.

Mentor Mentee Relationship Stages

Establishing a positive mentor mentee relationship is very much like establishing any other human relationship. It requires both parties to have a genuine desire to understand the values and expectations of each other.

A mentor mentee mentoring relationship goes through four stages over the period of nine to twelve months:

Initiation
Negotiation
Growth
Closure

Each stage is equally important to make a relationship successful and should be treated with the same priority. While the time spent in each phase differs from relationship to relationship, the progression is uniform.



Mentor Mentee Relationship Stage 1: Initiation

The first stage is a very important stage of a mentoring relationship. The mentor mentee get to know each other, see if they are the right match, and build the relationship. They informally discuss their common interests, values, future goals, and dreams.

Since the mentoring pair is new in the relationship, the first stage can be a bit challenging. There can be confusion, difficulty in communication, or even lack of communication. In many cases, mentees are reluctant to trust their mentors at this stage.

If this stage is not treated as a priority, the relationship can cut short because of miscommunication and misunderstanding.

Mentors play a vital role here to make the relationship work. Not only do they take the initiatives to communicate with the mentee, but also devote time to the relationship. They make sure the mentee feels comfortable with them. Further, they are responsible for building trust in the mentee.


Mentor Mentee Relationship Stage 2: Negotiation

The second stage is the business stage of a mentor-mentee relationship. It is the stage where a mentor helps the mentee set learning goals. They also agree on their initial expectations and define the strategy to achieve the target. Besides, they talk about when and how they will meet, what will be the frequency of their meeting and accountability.

Although mentors and mentees work on setting goals and creating a work plan, the negotiation stage is not quite simple. It involves talking about soft issues in a relationship, establishing ground rules, confidentiality, boundaries, and shared responsibilities. These are the topics that are often left out of conversations because they are not very easy to talk about. Yet, these are critical topics that need to be discussed.

If a mentoring pair is not compatible, negotiation is the stage where they can part their ways in a friendly manner.

Mentor Mentee Relationship Stage 3: Growth

[mentor mentee relationship stage: growth] Once the trust is built and the expectations are discussed, a mentoring relationship enters into the 3rd stage- growth. At this stage, the mentoring partners start working towards the goals that were set. This stage offers the greatest opportunity for learning and development.

The mentor’s responsibilities at this stage are to help the mentee with various mentoring resources for their development. They share knowledge and experience through storytelling. They help mentees overcome challenges; and gradually a mentor becomes a guide, adviser, and friend to the mentee.

Another key responsibility of a mentor is to provide honest, candid, yet constructive feedback to the mentee. Because feedback is the most important part of a mentoring relationship. It allows mentors to acknowledge the mentee’s strengths and help them identify their weaknesses; which is crucial for mentees’ growth.

During this phase, both the partners monitor the learning process and progress to ensure the goals are being met.


Mentor Mentee Relationship Stage 4: Closure

At the fourth stage, the mentor mentee formally close their mentoring association. This can happen due to various reasons- the program is over, the goals are accomplished, needs become fulfilled, or something else. Still, this stage is more than simply marking an end to the relationship. It is an opportunity for the mentoring pair to recognize and celebrate their success.

Both mentor and mentee benefit from closure. It is an opportunity to harvest the learning and apply it in real-life situations.

Conclusion

Any mentoring relationship moves through these four phases. Yet, there is no specific formula to create a successful relationship. It takes effort from both partners to make it work. And if at any stage, the relationship experiences hardship, communication is the only solution.

Benefits of Mentoring Program to the Mentee

∗  Shortens learning curve

∗  Helps socialise to appropriate legal related norms and behaviours

∗  Develops ones professional network

∗  Helps to reach a higher level of preparedness

∗  Fosters the ability to engage in ethical conduct

∗  Develops professional practice, values, and community

An increasing number of organizations are seeking out coaching and mentoring options to ready their personnel for potential future leadership roles. Unfortunately, not all coaches and mentors share equal wisdom and techniques for nurturing leadership in individuals. Hence, it is vital to consider certain factors, explained hereunder, to ensure that mentors communicate their thoughts effectively to mentees and obtain the desired results.

Developing Rapport

The cornerstone of a sound rapport is trust. If the individuals meeting with the mentors do not believe them to be genuine, they will not disclose their viewpoints wholly and will be hesitant to accept the suggestions and directions. Thus to form a grounded base for coaching, it is critical to create an atmosphere of faith and assurance.

Also, when there’s mutual trust involved in the leadership mentoring sessions, it helps mentors understand their mentees’ perspectives fully. This way, mentors can connect with mentees’ struggles and give pertinent advice, resulting in favorable results.

For these reasons, forging a secure yet welcoming environment is pivotal for nurturing trust between mentors and mentees. Mentors should endeavor to be genuine and straightforward in all interactions with mentees, demonstrating that they are amiable and eager to listen to them without bias. Furthermore, mentors must ensure the secrecy of their mentees’ shared information, assuring that whatever is revealed remains confidential.

Encouraging Talents

Mentors and coaches should strive to assist rising leaders in achieving their utmost capabilities. It’s essential to recognize that every individual has distinctive characteristicsand that upcoming leaders have their own individual styles that contrast with mentors. 

The objective is not to shape them into mini clones of mentors or coaches but to spur them to hone their own leadership capabilities and knacks. That said, mentors can lend a hand by appreciating and lauding their mentees’ accomplishments and growth. This sort of constructive reinforcement will energize them to refine their aptitudes in their desired fields.

Simply put, mentoring and coaching are about shepherding individuals on their journey to success attainment, and honoring their leadership particularities. Hence, mentors and coaches should be aware of their mentees’ capabilities and shortcomings and motivate them when necessary. 

One of the trusted ways is by providing constructive feedback to shape leadership among individuals during mentorship programs and coaching sessions. Elaborately put, instead of criticizing or nitpicking, mentors should focus on offering practical suggestions for improvement. They should also listen actively to their mentees’ concerns and ideas, and be willing to adjust their approach according to the situation. 

By taking these initiatives, they can assist aspiring innovators to articulate themselves and exceed their current potential. Consequently, this will permit mentees to outperform in their yearning to become outstanding leaders and make valuable contributions to the firm.

Appreciation and Recognition

Mentors and coaches should consider all chances to celebrate their coachees’ and mentees’ progress every time–since they are the catalysts of such development. The acknowledgement of any form of potential leadership contributions is an incredible way to express the mentors’ and coaches’ admiration and awareness for all the efforts put in by individuals to reach the set goals. 

Importantly, advisors’ display of advisees’ appreciation and hard work can aid to build a positive, productive workplace atmosphere. In fact, this thoughtful gesture can make a huge difference in uplifting executives’ leadership spirits and inspiring them to have a greater sense of commitment to the organization. Importantly, this ultimately boosts work engagement; improves coachees’ and mentees’ well-being, and offers enormous returns for organizations in the future.

For instance, when mentors and coaches notice that their apprentices have managed to finish a project or hit personal goals within the allotted timeframe, it should be celebrated with tangible rewards. The rewards can be gift cards, or even a fun shindig–recognitions which are a surefire way to bolster confidence and propel future successes.

Goals Based on SMART Attributes

Mentors can assist potential leaders in reaching the apex of their potential by setting ambitious goals that possess SMART characteristics. These goals will give them a positive boost and provide them with the opportunity to excel if they are fully respected; otherwise, they would just remain ink on paper.

But what does the term SMART stands for? The abbreviation SMART means Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound. 

Establishing well-defined objectives based on SMART attributes ensures trainees have a clear sense of their goal accomplishment. This will assist to concentrate their vigor in the desired direction, drastically raising their chances of triumph.

Furthermore, monitoring progress through trackable goals through mentoring platforms is one way to stay realistic and evaluate their progress effectively. Setting practical aims makes sure that the targets set are attainable so they don’t get discouraged by not succeeding.

It is paramount to be mindful of relevant leadership aspects and timelines when establishing objectives. This will drive individuals to persist even during testing moments. Lastly, having a time limit will induce a sense of urgency, making sure commitments are completed before the targetted timeline.

Conclusion

Summing up, coaching and mentoring can be potent means of fostering new leadership in an organization. Although the strategies might vary, both involve creating robust bonds with individuals receiving guidance.

By honing in on motivating talents, expressing gratitude and acknowledgement, and outlining objectives based on SMART qualities, companies can foster their upcoming generation of leaders with these initiatives. With the proper tactics in place, mentoring and coaching can create a tangible impact in furthering long-term success for any business.

Considering this, if organizations intend to provide holistic mentoring sessions on leadership to their workforce, virtual mentoring platforms such as Mentoring Complete with tons of features will be an apt choice.

When conversing with Mentee.

Be yourself.

Share your experiences and stories.

Do not interrupt the mentee to make a point.

Keep eye contact to assure the mentee you are actively engaged in the conversation.

Do not be quick to offer a response, sometimes the mentee just wants you to listen.

Pick an environment that it will be easy to have a conversation and set aside the appropriate time so the conversation is not rushed.

About Coaching

Coaching is a useful way of developing people's skills and abilities, and of boosting performance. It can also help deal with issues and challenges before they become major problems.

A coaching session will typically take place as a conversation between the coach and the coachee (person being coached), and it focuses on helping the coachee discover answers for themselves. After all, people are much more likely to engage with solutions that they have come up with themselves, rather than those that are forced upon them!

In some organizations, coaching is still seen as a corrective tool, used only when things have gone wrong. But in many companies, coaching is considered to be a positive and proven approach for helping others explore their goals and ambitions, and then achieve them.

Coaches in the workplace are not counselors, psychotherapists, gurus, teachers, trainers, or consultants – although they may use some of the same skills and tools.

Most formal, professional coaching is carried out by qualified people who work with clients to improve their effectiveness and performance, and help them achieve their full potential. Coaches can be hired by coachees, or by their organizations. Coaching on this basis works best when everyone clearly understands the reason for hiring a coach, and when they jointly set the expectations for what they want to achieve through coaching.

However, managers and leaders in the organization can be just as effective as externally hired coaches. Managers don't have to be trained formally as coaches. As long as they stay within the scope of their skill set, and maintain a structured approach, they can add value, and help develop their people's skills and abilities.

Where Coaching Can Help

Here are a few examples of questions that you can answer with the benefit of coaching:

How can I manage my time better to achieve all I want in life?
What should I do next in my career within the organization?
How can I reduce the stress in my job or my life?
How can I achieve a better balance between work life and home life?
What skills do I need to grow and develop further?
How can I improve my relationship with a specific colleague?

Golden Rules of Coaching

These are the fundamental "rules" of coaching:

Coaching is Founded on Confidentiality and Trust

Coaching can be successful only if coachees are able to discuss every aspect of an issue or challenge with their coach. The coach may need to listen to personal problems or private information that must be kept confidential. (Unless, of course, it involves criminal activity or activities harmful to the team, its clients or the organization; or affects the safety and welfare of other people.)

The Solution to the Coachee's Issue Lies Within the Coachee

This may sound unusual, but it means that the background of an issue and the options available are generally known to the coachee. The coach's job is to ask the right questions to help coachees arrive at their own conclusions. As we've said before, this is a very powerful way of helping people to change.

Of course, the coach can provide helpful input or suggestions, but the best answers usually come from the coachee.

Tip:

There's a difference here between the type of coaching conducted by a professional coach (who doesn't know about the day-to-day functioning of the organization) and coaching conducted by a manager (who does). As a manager, you probably have useful knowledge and experience, and you're responsible for helping people find the right answers to questions they're asking. However, be sensitive and humble in the way you help people – situations may be more complex than you initially think!

There's no Judgment or Fixed Agenda, but Have an Agreed Goal for Each Session

For a coaching session to work well, there should be a lot of relaxed conversation, and the session should be free from the fear of judgment and should not follow any set pattern. At the same time, coaching conversations must be focused in order to be effective.

The coachee should have a general idea or outline of the objectives of the coaching, both within the specific session and in the longer term. The coach then helps the coachee arrive at that destination by whatever route seems appropriate. The coach should check with the coachee during the session to determine if they're both moving in the right direction.

Coaching is About the Whole Person

Although a coaching session will probably focus on one issue, coaches must remember that they're having a conversation with a whole person who has specific experiences, emotions, and patterns of behavior.

Workplace coaching will probably focus on workplace issues, but coaches must recognize that other factors and issues will likely enter the conversation.

The Coach and Coachee are Equal Partners

The best coaching conversations are set up so that the coach and coachee are equal partners, whatever relationship and hierarchy might exist in the workplace. The coachee will define the actual issue, while the coach will use his or her skills to help deal with the issue.

Coaching Looks to the Future and Next Actions

Coachees are typically looking for some change to their performance, career, or life direction. Determining the right path may require the coachee to look at past experiences and decisions.

However, the most positive coaching experiences are sessions that conclude with an agreed set of next steps or actions to take.

Tip:

Good coaching sessions typically last between one and two hours. If they're less than an hour long, it's likely that the topic, or topics, won't be reviewed in sufficient detail. If a session lasts more than two hours, both the coach and coachee may lose focus and concentration.

Key Approaches Used in Coaching

These are useful approaches that you can use in coaching sessions:

Structured Questioning

Most coaching is achieved by asking the right questions – the types of questions that coachees would ask of themselves.

With practice and experience, you can develop a sense of what the right questions are. But as a simple rule, start with open questions, and then ask more specific and probing questions once the coachee has raised an issue or concern.

Active Listening

Listen actively so that you pay attention to the fine detail of what coachees are saying, and how they're saying it. This is key to understanding a coachee's position at a deep enough level.

Is there a lot of emotion attached to the words that the coachee is using? If so, what emotion? Passion, fear, excitement, dread, anger, joy?

How does the coachee's body language compare with the words being spoken? We often use words lightly, but the underlying meaning may say a lot about what we feel or believe. For example, phrases starting with "I should do …" or "I must do …" are very different from phrases starting with "I will …"

Summarizing and Repeating

During a coaching session, summarize where the coaching conversation, or part of the conversation, has led. This helps the coachee relax and continue, as they know that you have taken an interest, and see the whole picture.

You should also occasionally repeat what coachees say – particularly when it could help you understand how their behaviors or expressions might be seen by others.

Checking in With the Coachee

During a coaching session, it really helps to confirm with coachees that the session is going well for them and that it's covering what they want it to cover.

It's normal for coaches to give "homework assignments" to coachees. This does not mean the coaches are taking on the role of teacher. It simply means that both coach and coachee agree that some structured thinking time between coaching sessions is of value.

Example Coaching Questions

A member of your team has asked you to help them improve her time management. You schedule in a coaching session with her, and ask these questions:

Where are the key conflicts in your use of time?
What usually stops you from leaving work at a regular time?
How do you think you could address that problem and stop it from happening?
What stops you from getting up an hour earlier to do X?
What support do you have at home to do Y?
How could you get more support at home for Y?
How could you get more support at work for the regular tasks you perform?
How do you feel about delegating at work and at home?
What is the main priority for how you spend your time?
How do you deal with distractions?

These are simple, open questions. But the answers to these and other similar questions will often show that the real issue behind a time management problem, for example, has nothing to do with time management – but rather, something to do with how the coachee feels. If you have an issue with time management, try answering some of the questions above. Substitute X for an activity you believe you want to do, but never seem to make time to do it. Substitute Y for a home or family task that you always have to do yourself.

External coaches often have to deal with a coachee's major life changes and more wide-ranging career considerations. When managers act as coaches, they should think about whether to coach on these topics, depending on whether there's a potential conflict of interest with the manager's regular organizational role.

Key Points

Coaching is great for helping people develop their skills and abilities, and for resolving issues before they become serious.

Coaching is useful in many different situations, and you can use coaching as part of your everyday role. Use the approaches we've discussed here, as well as tools such as the GROW model to help you structure your sessions.

Always remember to keep the coachee's interests at the forefront of coaching sessions. Also, try to let coachees come up with their own conclusions through open questions, rather than giving them the answers directly.

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As the Mentor, DO

∗ Be open to the mentee’s ideas and discuss topics

∗ Respect your mentee’s time as much as your own

∗ Keep your relationship on a professional basis

∗ Always ask if you can make a suggestion or offer critique∗ Recognize and work through conflict in a caring way

As the Mentor, DON’T

∗ Expect the mentee to lead

∗ Automatically give unsolicited advice or criticism ∗ Assume your advice will be followed

∗ Expect a clone of yourself

∗ Move too quickly to friendship, if at all

∗ Take your mentee for granted

∗ Assume she/he does not need reinforcement

∗ End the relationship on bad terms